Wedding Etiquette

We have been enjoying, taking part in, and attending weddings for centuries, however they have evolved over time into what we recognize today as the perfect wedding. Then again, what is the perfect wedding? A desert island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean or Westminster Abbey? Then we have to consider the dreaded guest list and the Plus 1’s, and let’s not forget the children and animals you wish to invite. 

I have created my top ten list of things to remember when it comes to weddings, and if you follow my advice you will be able to recreate your very own Royal Wedding. 

Now, before we go any further, an important fact. A wedding is a ceremony where two people are united in marriage. Wedding traditions do indeed vary from country to country. The majority of wedding services involve the exchange of vows to each other, and above all, the important wedding ring. This all has to be conducted by an authorized figure and in a licensed venue so let’s not ask the local plumber. Special wedding garments might be worn, and the ceremony is usually followed by a wedding reception, dinner and dancing. 

1. Invitations and save the date - Please give the guests as much notice as possible the minimum of 12 weeks. The invitation should be sent out 6 weeks prior to the wedding.  Some people may also have an engagement party once the announcement has been released with perhaps an official photograph or an announcement in the national or local paper. 

2. The Guest List - This can make and break friendships. The so called Plus 1’s are only accepted if they are known to the bride and groom, and of course only if numbers permit as this also affects the venue, food and drink. In other words the all important budget. Don't be offended if children aren't invited, as this could be due to space etc.

3. Wedding Ceremony Seating - Ushers have the very important duty of showing guests to their places. The groom’s family and friends should be seated on the right, and bride’s on the left, and let’s not forget the hierarchy as this again can make or break families. The senior members of the family are seated on the front rows, and don't forget to leave room for the bridesmaids and flower girls, as they will walk up the aisle behind the bride. 

4. Money Money Money - Traditionally the Bride’s wonderful and very generous parents paid the overall cost of the wedding in order to marry their daughter to a gentleman. The groom’s parents these days may pay for the drinks or going away car. This is open for discussion in the 21st century, which will please a lot of bride’s parents.

5. The Reception/Wedding Breakfast – bride and groom meet and greet the guests at they arrive. A traditional sit down meal have the top table with the bride and groom, both sets of parents, best man and chief bridesmaid. During a drinks reception photos can be taken.

6. Gifts - The bride and groom buy the presents for the bridesmaids, flower girls, best man, page boys and of course the usher. Don't forget they also buy a gift or flowers for the mothers, which would be presented at the speeches. Presents to the happy couple are opened in advance so thank you letters can be written on honeymoon.

7. Speeches - These  are made at either the drinks reception or during a meal when guests sit down, and some people may even give speeches during the coffee. For the speeches we have the best man who thanks the bridesmaids and flower girl and reads out messages, followed by the bride’s father, and finally the speeches are ended with the groom, who will thank the parents of the bride and his parents.  

8. The Cake - The all important wedding cake is normally cut at the end of the speeches. This is a very important photo opportunity but lets keep this dignified as it is not a photo-shoot for the next Marks and Spencer's campaign. If you choose a chocolate cake always have a top tier made as fruitcake to send family or close friends if they could not attend. Top tiers are also for keeping for the christening the first child. 

9. Honeymoon - The bride and groom pay the actual honeymoon; never assume the parents will pay for this!  Around 23.00pm the Bride and groom will change into their “Going Away Clothes” and will then depart for their romantic break to either a desert island or wherever your dreams take you. 

10. Fireworks - Upon departing you might arrange a little fireworks display but if we are looking at 30 seconds of cheap fireworks and not a 5min extravaganza then let’s pass on this idea. The couple would then usually depart at midnight.

Petiquette

The Great British public are famously known as pet lovers, however these days that can be said in quite a few other countries as well. As we see our beloved pets become more than just the dog or the cat as they become our Bobo, Cuddles and Precious and are very much now part of the family. Gone are the days of sleeping outside in the cold dark kennel and hello to a palatial bedroom which may even consist of a four poster bed, with a gold water bowl and special lifts to get up and down one’s stair case. Yes, it really is a dog’s life! In fact, I even know some dogs that are looked after better than your other half. 

Now what we have to try to remember is that our beloved children may not be viewed in the same light when they decided to jump on your ex best friend’s luxury sofa or have a lovely roll around after a lovely walk outside while enjoying a mud bath, on their newly laid cream carpet; Yes, the joys of ex-best friends. But animal lovers across the world, don't worry I am going to save your relationships with you friends, families and better halves as I have created the top ten pet etiquette rules. Follow these rules and we won’t go wrong. 

1: Chairs and Bedding - This may be the normal procedure for your beloved pet to go on your soft furnishings, however, when visiting others we don't allow this unless permission is granted in advance. 

2: Ask before we feed - Never feed someone else’s pet without permission, owners may have them on strict diets or they might be allergic to something the same way us humans cannot eat things, therefore always ask.

3: Don’t stroke without permission - Our beloved pets may be like gentle little ‘Winnie the Poo’ to us but to someone else it might be more of a case of Jaws, therefore always ask before we stroke.

4: Always pick up their “manure”  – Unfortunately, our loved one’s (referring to the pets) may suddenly have to go, lets face it we have all been there, but sadly they are unable to deal with the aftermath so can we always make sure we bag and bin as soon as the procedure is over. 

5: Always ask before taking them with you - They may have been to palaces, castles, stately homes and the local spa, however Great Aunt Dorothy may not feel the same warmth toward your Bobo as you do; therefore always ask before taking them with you. Even if visiting a shop, always ask before you enter.

6: Never leave them with someone else without their permission - For some reason some people find it quite acceptable to suddenly pop off to the shops and leave the family pet with their best friend at a moment’s notice. We must always plan and ask in advance and we never assume.  If you have a pet visiting you, make sure you have plenty of water and a few treats.

7: Always give a gift to a pet sitter - If someone is good enough to look after your Cuddles, then may I suggest a little gift might be in order and I don't mean vouchers for the local Psychiatric ward but more a voucher for a local spa or if there is a budget, then a nice box of chocolates. 

8: Pay for any damage they may cause - Animals will be animals and to your shock, may have a mad five minutes, and your little Precious has either caused minimal damage or a scene that resembles a war zone, therefore always be willing to cover the costs of any damage. 

9: Don’t let other people trip over them - Our little babies can be a trip hazard especially when they are the size of a mouse, therefore we must always be aware of this.  In large crowds perhaps pick them up and carry them through the public, I doubt they will complain. 

10: Keep noise volume to an Alexa two.  - Our little sweeties can have large, loud voices similar to the local fog horn which I very much doubt the neighbours will appreciate; therefore perhaps ask them or even better train them to lower their beautiful voices.